If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
Randomize
