Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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