You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho