dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
