All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Randomize
