just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Randomize
