I hate your face
I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm scared
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I looked at my own cervix.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
