The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Randomize