She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
Randomize
