i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
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