You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
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