I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Randomize
