I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
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