I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
17 year olds will be the death of me.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
