It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Randomize
