He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Just pee around me
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
