uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
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