why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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