My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
