This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
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