I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
