I wanna passion pit in your ass
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
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