just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Randomize
