awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Randomize