isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Randomize
