I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Randomize
