who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
