I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
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