So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
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