I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
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