Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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