i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
So vagazzling was a success
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
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