Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Randomize
