Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
