I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize