He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
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