My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
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