he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
I wish I only lived at night.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
