Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
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