Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
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