please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Randomize
