apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize