She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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