Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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