i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize
