Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize