so that wasnt chicken after all
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
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