I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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