don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
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