Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Randomize
