If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
