The maid of honor just puked.
So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
